Month: March 2008

A few observations on encountering the right thing at the right time

On By PaxIn Chrysalis, Day OneLeave a comment

I try never to disparage the metaphysical, magickal, or spiritual books I encounter. Even the ones that are wildly inaccurate with their facts or that seem to me to be poorly written. I know in my own experience that it has sometimes been some small thing, a sentence or an image, in or out of context, that has led me to a realization or to wisdom. I try not to deny anyone else that transformative moment/experience.

~~~

For a long time now I have been hungering for some new words about Magick and Witchcraft and the Gods, and found them in T. Thorn Coyle’s excellent book Evolutionary Witchcraft. Reading about a Witchcraft at once very different and yet, from my readings about and by members of Reclaiming, strangely familiar; it has been invigorating.

I haven’t done many of the exercises, not sure if I will. But reading of them, and of the discussions of the importance of movement, and stillness, and breath. It has reminded me of so many things I had set aside until later… or of things that I always said I would learn more about someday…

Well, someday is now!

~~~

In writing to thank T. Thorn Coyle for her book, I realized that it’s been 9 months since I started this blog and this journey towards spiritual renewal and a rekindling of my magickal and Witchy self.

I don’t imagine that this journey is over… heck it’s barely just begun; and yet I do feel renewed on some deep and powerful level.

Peace, and Blessed Be!
Pax

I am a Modern Pagan

On By PaxIn everyday, Modern Pagan2 Comments

I am a Modern Pagan
By Geoffrey Stewart

I have been practicing and living as a Witch for most of the last 17 of my 36 years. I have recently begun a relationship with Hecate and Dionysus; this has led me to sign up on some Hellenic Recon discussion groups and to start researching Hellenic Recon Paganism. I have also been feeling an internal urging to begin blending my Nationality with my Spirituality, part of this has been joining the Religio Americana discussion group.

So I was, until recently, concerned about how to integrate my worship of the Lord and Lady of Witchcraft; and my recently begun relationship with Hecate and Dionysus. I was also concerned about trying to craft a liturgical Calendar for myself.

In the last day or so (March, 6th, 2008) I have realized that I am a 21st Century Pagan citizen of the United States. I know, startling realization that… but bear with me, I do have a point. The thing is, although I may worship and revere ancient Greek Gods and Goddesses (among others), I am neither Greek nor in Greece, nor living in the Ancient world. I am a Modern American Pagan.

I do not need to recreate or live my life by some ancient Greek Calendar to honor the Greek Gods. Just as the Gods are an important part of my life so to should they be an important part of the 21st Century. For me, part of that is interweaving my honoring of the Gods, and my Witchcraft, with my life as a Modern American.

I find myself realizing that I, like a lot of Pagans, felt this need to somehow reinvent the wheel when it came to my spiritual and religious life. What’s wrong with honoring the Divinities in accordance with the rhythms of MY life? NOTHING!

I can honor the Gods as best I can in accordance with the Gregorian calendar and the Modern Wheel of the Year. February, for example, is a perfectly good time to honor Aphrodite. The Sabbats and Esbats are for Witchcraft and for my budding relationship with Hecate. Now don’t get me wrong, the Sabbats and the Seasons and the Esbats and the Wheel of the Year are important. Attuning oneself to the rhythms of the world around one is an important part of being a Pagan. But trying to recreate some ancient cycle of celebrations is not for me. I am living in the 21st Century and the patterns of my life are in some ways drastically different from those of an Athenian in the 5th Century BCE.

While this may seem like a simple realization, I am finding rather freeing. I can stop worrying about “am I doing this right?” and start getting around to the business of living my life and worshiping the Gods.

I am also free to develop my sense of needing to weave my Paganism into my nationality as an American. I can pour libations to the Founding Fathers, and Mothers; I can light Candles to Liberty and to Columbia and Uncle Sam.

I feel like I also have some research to do as to how I am going to do this, but this doesn’t feel like work. Somehow, trying to weave together an ancient Calendar of religious observances with the modern Wheel of the Year and my daily life did seem like work or more accurately drudgery. And while honoring the gods should involve some work, some effort and even thought, it should never seem like a bother or a chore.

Peace, Pax

PS_ I have no problem with Recon Pagans who feel the need to honor their Gods and Goddesses in accordance within the framework of the ancient calendars; it’s just not for me.

I would welcome any thoughts or discussions on this point.

Recent Realization

On By PaxIn Chrysalis, everydayLeave a comment

So I have been picking up my daily practices again. My daily prayer and my daily visualization of the Quabilistic Cross.

In the last couple of weeks I have been in the process of kicking, or at least learning to manage, a nicotene habit.

In the last few days I have been dreaming. Well, I suppose I dream more often then that, but in the last few days I have actively remembered my dreams. I don’t usually. They have also felt… important, but not specific or specifically symbolic or precognitive.

I have had occasional precognitive dreams, but these didn’t have the same feel to them…

I have also been doing some daily spiritual cleansing work while in the shower. Thinking of those times in my life where I have faced pain, negativity, betrayal, frustration, and various other forms of negative experience and behavior. I have washed them away, they have happened, and I may have helped them to happen in some cases, but they are NOT a part of me anymore.

I am also realizing that I have held to this idea of myself as not being worthy, or good enough, in some strange way; for most of my life. Even as I have struggled with my own spiritual evolution and my own winding path to adulthood, I have allowed the vile voice within to keep returning and saying the same tired litany…

Well I am worth it!

I can’t find the techno dance version of this song that I first heard in the 2000’s but here is a version of the songs lyrics as interpreted by the Divine Ms. M…

Bette Midler – I’m Beautiful Lyrics
“That’s it, baby! When you got it, flaunt it, flaunt it!”
“This is the Divine Miss M and I’m here to share with you some rare and stimulating insight into my cosmic fabulosity. It’s really very simple. I simply believe with all my heart:”
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful,damn it!
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful,damn it!
I’m beautiful, so beautiful, I’m beautiful, damn it!
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful,damn it!
“Go away, little girl,” they used to say.
“Hey, you’re too fat, baby, you can’t play.”
“Hold on, miss thing, what you trying to do?
You know you’re too white to be in our school.”
Too white, too smart, too fast, too fine,
too loud, too tough, too too divine.
I said you don’t belong. You don’t belong.
Too loud, too big, too much to bear,
too bold, too brash, too prone to swear.
I heard that song for much too long.
Ain’t this my sun? Ain’t this my moon?
Ain’t this my world to be who I choose?
Ain’t this my song? Ain’t this my move?
Ain’t this my world? I know I can do it.
I’m not too short, I’m not too tall,
I’m not too big, I’m not too small.
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
I’m not too white, I’m not too black,
I’m not too this, I’m not too that.
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, damn it!
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, damn it!
It’s time to call it what it is. Don’t play the naming game.
Become what you were born to be and be it unashamed.
“Go away, little boy,” I can hear them say,
“Everybody on the block says they think you’re gay.
Hold on, my friend, do you think we’re blind?
Take a look at yourself. You’re not our kind.”
Too black, too white, too short, too tall,
too blue, too green, too red, too small.
I said you don’t belong. You don’t belong.
Too black, too white, too short, too tall,
too blue, too green, too red, too small.
I heard that song for much to long.
Ain’t this my sun? Ain’t this my moon?
Ain’t this my world to be who I choose?
Ain’t this my song? Ain’t this my move?
Ain’t this my world? I know I can do it.
People always ask me,
“Miss M, how did you get so far
on so little?” Shut up!
Well, I woke up one morning,
flossed my teeth and decided,
“Damn, I’m fierce!” You look good!
You can be just like me! A goddess? Yeah!
Don’t just pussy foot around and sit on your assets.
Unleash your ferocity upon an unsuspecting world.
Rise up and repeat after me: “I’m beautiful!”
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful!
Can you say that?
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful!
I don’t hear you!
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful!
Louder!
I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful!
Hey!
That’s it, baby, when you got it, flaunt it, flaunt it!
Aaaaaah!
Ain’t this my sun? My sun! Ain’t this my moon? My moon!
Ain’t this my world to be who I choose?
Ain’t this our song? Ain’t this our song?
Ain’t this our movie? Ain’t this our move?
Ain’t this our world to be who we choose?
I’m not too short, I’m not too tall,
I’m not too big, I’m not too small.
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
I’m not too white, I’m not too black,
I’m not too this, I’m not too that.
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
Ooh, don’t lemme start lovin’ myself!
I’m beautiful, damn it!

More Bette Midler Lyrics…